bannersalwaysangry:

Thor….

I just want to apologize again for what I’ve done to you. I …

never meant to hurt anyone. I never do mean to hurt anyone.

yet it’s all he knows to do.

I understand if you don’t….want to be around me. He’s a danger and a threat, a monster. 

My friend I have no need of your apologies. But they are accepted.

I know you meant me no real harm, and I was happy to take the brunt of the attack for the safety of those less able to withstand it. Consider it forgotten and let us move on from the incident as if nothing has happened.

I shall always enjoy your company. Hulk or no Hulk. You are the only friend I have here that does not treat me like an idiot or belittle me for my lack in knowledge of Midgardian customs. You, when you are yourself, treat me far better than anyone else. 

So set aside your foolish worries and let me know when we might get together for coffee. Decaffeinated for you, I think. He laughs softly.

(Source: protectorofmidgard)

Hello my midgardian friends. I have returned once more to earth after an extended stay with my people, healing up after my altercation with Banner. I am quite well now.

bannersalwaysangry:

With a turn of his head, he looked at Thor up and down, his eyes rather annoyed.

Usually? It was fine when people hovered around him. Sure, it was a little annoying, but nothing a few breathing exercises  and positive mentalities couldn’t fix up. But with Thor, something seemed to power over him when he did that. The idea that this man, so large in stature, was looking over every bit of information he had collected. It was all a bit off putting, to be honest. Though, not wanting to irritate the either of them, his head shifted back down into his research, his eyes locking onto his notes once more.

“Giants….” he mumbled, a small smirk of a would be laugh coming to his face. “If you’re the average, your dad must be the size of m—” And, for a moment, he stopped himself to fully comprehend what he was saying. Me. Not the other guy, not even the Hulk. Me. And it burned him so deep, almost automatically after uttering the last ‘M’, he closed his mouth tight, clenching his jaw and swallowing saliva.

After a few moments of silence, Bruce turned on his heel, face to face with Thor. “We need enthusiasm, gets work done.” a meek and timid voice came from the man now, shuffling himself over to another station, picking up a syringe and flicking the tip of it for less air bubbles.

It was going to be one hell of a day. 

Thor noted something seemed to have made Banner slightly uncomfortable and he didn’t comment, merely nodded. When he saw the syringe he raised his brows and tilted his head.

“What is that?” he asked, shuffling back a step. The last time a Midgardian had come at him with a needle the effects had been very unpleasant. He’d lost the ability to stay awake, and when he did come too he’d felt as if he’d been trampled by a heard of buffalo. He gave Bruce a very apprehensive look of distrust for a moment, not sure he wanted that coming near him.

bannersalwaysangry:

As he turned back, he sighed a bit, his head lurking down as he rubbed his brow. Sometimes, it had slipped his mind that Thor wasn’t exactly a human. Sometime it all blurred together- his seemingly-normal life as a drifter of the sciences and, well, and the other guys life. And with Thor? Thor was not demi-god until he truly showed it, questioned and confused by such simplistic things such as a measuring stick. As his head rose back up, his feet clicking against pavement as he began walking back towards his friend, he licked his lips slightly, grabbing one of Thor’s thick forearms. 

And strong they were.

It was a light tug towards the stick, directing him to the wall. As he pushed his hand, very lightly, on Thor’s chest to keep him up straight, he nodded. “See, just…stand straight.” his voice was shaken, a bit nervous. He still seemed to be thrown off guard by Thor, he grabbed his chart, checking the height of the Asgardian with wild eyes.  ”A…ahm….little over two meters….” was all he spoke, before shuffling away to a different station, placing down his chart, his glasses, and his head. “Your parents were giants or something….”

Thor allowed Bruce to direct him with simple pushes and pulls. No complaints, just compliance. He smiled a little and stepped away from the wall as Bruce began to scrawl things down onto his chart again.

“Loki is the one born of giant’s actually.” Thor replied, quiet, yet still somewhat thunderous laughter echoing off the walls from Thor’s amusement. “Asgardians come in many shapes and sizes. I am average among my people… What is next, Banner?”

He moved around to stand behind Bruce, leaning over his shoulder just slightly to look at his chart curiously, his front brushing briefly against Bruce’s back. He smiled a little and gave Bruce a light squeeze on his upper arm.

“I apologize if I seem anxious. It is just such an interesting study… I do not have the means or intellect that you do to preform the necessary tests and such.”

bannersalwaysangry replied to your quote: ♫

((The mun will cry. And Thor will be grouchy. And you really don’t want a grouchy Thor on your hands do you? He might just start a thunderstorm indoors or something… But more importantly… The mun will cry. Because reasons.

bannersalwaysangry:

His eyes focused on the scale now, he adjusted the weights that seemed so off from once they were (Bruce’s weight). So, as he began to manipulate the scale, bringing them higher and higher on the system, his mouth began to move once more. “I can’t thank you enough for…ahm..For allowing this.” he commented, his hands shifting the weights, his eyes growing wider as he did so. Past 200, obvious….past 230….250….280….

“Uhm…” he blinked, pulling away from the scale and looking up at Thor with true ashtonishment. And then, a mumble of numbers followed.

“131.54.”

As he ran to grab his chart across the lab tables, he looked back to his dear teammate, smirking a bit while talking. “No wonder you pack a wallop.” Though, he didn’t know quite what to expect, most of his experiments now were focused solely on him. He rarely had time to research anything outside of the gamma radiation field, and when he did, it was spent sleeping, meditating, or becoming the monster that was his other half. As he wrote the weight down, (both 131.54 kg and 290lbs) he nodded at Thor, nodding his head over to a measuring stick plastered to a wall. 

“Now your height…” he paused in his speech for a moment, then continued. 

“On…ahm…Asgard, do you…check your height?” 

Thor moved off the scale, tilting his head as he was directed toward the next tool of measurement. 

“On Asgard we have no need for such things.” he commented, looking at the stick plastered on the wall. He furrowed his brow and looked to Bruce questioningly. “Do I… Just stand beside this then?”

He pointed at it with a raised brow, not sure how it was meant to work.

bannersalwaysangry:

As he fixed the light fixtures for one of the last 3D models, he watched his hands patiently. Careful, Banner thought to himself, one slip up- one angered out burst would become a whole mess. As much as relocating for the twelfth time in America alone was fantastic, he became quite attached to the basement laboratory he worked extensively on creating. And that was his problem. Bruce Banner was an absolute mess, who didn’t deserve anything more than a few experiments to cure himself, and a prison cell with his name on it. Somehow? The man had gotten it easy. People praised Bruce Banner for the invention of his other half, and the only person that seemed to be scarred by the whole ordeal was Bruce.

It was sickening.

Regardless, the problem was- Bruce never could get attached to anything again.

And yet, as he turned back to look at Thor, he almost wanted to smile. He could feel the creases of his skin move upward into a happy look. Jovial. Thor had complied with him, and this would make the whole testing process easier than before. “Good, now…ahm…” his hands gestured to get onto the scale, fixing it a bit before he had the chance to make it on. “Just, if you’ll step on…the scale…”

With a content smile on his face Thor stepped onto the scale, watching Bruce work. It was nice to see him look less sad for a change. When he’d last seen Bruce there had been such lingering sadness in his eyes. He had seen what the beast inside Bruce was capable of. He’d taken the brunt of an attack from the man and sometimes, when he thought on that fight in the air ship his muscles ached at the memory.

He knew it must have been terrifying to know that you held something so destructive inside you. Thor was not afraid of Banner, and knew better than to praise such a thing as “the other guy” even if he admired the capabilities of the beast. 

No. Thor much preferred this Bruce. Intelligent, focused, and content looking Bruce.

“Interesting. So this device records my weight. We do not have such things on Asgard… Our only scales are used for tradesmen who weigh their wares.” Thor commented. He was a man made of dense, lean muscle, standing six and a half feet tall. A living, breathing, walking and talking demigod. He wondered if he would weigh a significant amount by human standards. By Asgardian standards, Thor was actually quite average.

bannersalwaysangry:

“Ah…”

He briefly paused, looking his partner up and down, before coming to the final conclusion. 

“I’m going to need you to take off any heavy objects that might weight your natural body down. We’re going to first weight you.”

He took a deep breath in, his eyes averting away from the subject to look back at a few tests. He could handle a simple task like that, right? Just the shoes, the hammer, and he was set. As long as he didn’t slip any heavy armor on underneath his shirt, he should have been set to go. And with that thought crossing his mind, Banner’s hand weakly pointed over to a scale near the entrance of the large, glass room. “And head over there when you’re done….” his words were weak as he focused back on some test tubes, cringing at the thought of how today would go.

Either Thor would break every test and it would be a disaster.

Or he might have been the first man to every get a solid mulit-universe law.

Thor moved toward the scale and gingerly set his hammer on the floor, careful not to let it hit the concrete too hard. He shucked out of the shoes he wore and frowned as he contemplated what constituted as heavy. The leather jacket had to go that much he was certain of. But was a shirt heavy by Midgardian standards as well? He was used to wearing his hefty armor so he was slightly unsure. He slipped his belt with it’s decorative buckle (a gift from Tony the gaudy thing.) off as well, setting these things aside. He cracked his neck a little and looked over his shoulder at Bruce who seemed thoroughly caught up in what he was doing.

“Is this sufficient?” Thor inquired. “My idea of heavy and yours is potentially quite different.”